mexmas day 5
3:47 a.m.
day 5 of the trip. time goes by vvery strangely on vacation. lotsa busy busy then lotsa nothing. it's kind of beautiful having spent all day tanning on the beach but have yet acquired appropriate tan. on the body area i have a web of clashing tanlines however that may determine what my nye dress will be.
so many days with mom has given further explanation as to why i am the way i am. if people thought i had poor table manners, they should share a meal with her. having sushi with her the other day has given me inspiration for my misocal. the only problem i'm encountering thus far with that feat is lack of danceable lyrics and storyline.
anyway. had a perfect day yesterday. the selvatica tour on the mayan riviera was awesome. nothing wrong. and it doesn't hurt that the guides were super cute. how i wish i was ziplining with them all them all the time.
and bikeriding and all those adventurous things. they make being active fun. and sexy.
speaking of, there are a couple of brothers (?) at my hotel hat are so fit. i almost wish i was here with bffs or at least my own bf. constant reminders why getting involved has its benefits. not to mention that it would decrease my illegible scrawls as these musings would more than likely be spoken to said bf.
i've had some weird dreams here too. firstly, a couple nights ago i dreamt that i kissed gb and he didn't seem to have any qualms around it. we were gonna catch up once i was done getting my stuff sorted (i was moving or something) but then i woke up. i also noted he was sweaty and freckly. he was extra gingery in my subconscious then i ever really consider. anyway, that's the second of intimate dreams i've had about geebs. the first having been a week or so ago when the ginge had admitted he'd love me but i couldn't reciprocate. i did appreciate the gesture still, but he didn't seem too thrilled. and perhaps felt a little hurt. i dunnno. subconscious gb is even harder to deciper than real life one.
anyway, my second nocturnal vision came to me last night and was almost too realistic to take for granted. a's friend bryan had told me he'd be interested in dating early on but things had gotten n the way (for example other lovers) but he would really like for us to try. being the commitmentphobe that i am, i couldn't give him a straight answer about going steady but i totally kissed him. twice. before consulting with the girls about the rightness of this coupling. they advised that it has to work because he is a good customer at the diner they work at. other friends sold bry's case to me, saying he was outgoing in unison while he sat there and blushed modestly. i'm sure i woke up at asome point and wasn't sure about the validity of my dream. but i resumed sleep and soon enough there was a group hang type thing and he took some time to talk to me about work and my day and he seemed genuinely interested in shit i had to say .i know i got flustered talking to him which i reckon he found endearing. then i was sure that my dream was true and had ached to ask him why things between him and his ex didnt work. never got around to discussing that as i woke up and faced the tough reality that all of it was just a dream. or dreams rather. have NO IDEA why bryan would be seeping into my subconscious. don't think i have given him a second thought since his bbq in the summertime. my radar doesnt tend to include people who are taken. perhaps this is the universe's way of letting us know he is back on the market.
god sometimes i wish i had my friends here to discuss these jungian issues. i broke today and logged onto facebook with my mom's berry. yesterday i had already checked my hotmail and read my facebook messages anyway. i am weak when it comes to staying disconnected. but 3ish days having cut the cord has been a fairly decent stretch by my standards. anyway, i heard back from liz when i left a message for before i left.. i may do sneaks nye with her. i will have to search around as soon as i get back before i commit. anyway too stressful to think about. so i will take a break.
so many days with mom has given further explanation as to why i am the way i am. if people thought i had poor table manners, they should share a meal with her. having sushi with her the other day has given me inspiration for my misocal. the only problem i'm encountering thus far with that feat is lack of danceable lyrics and storyline.
anyway. had a perfect day yesterday. the selvatica tour on the mayan riviera was awesome. nothing wrong. and it doesn't hurt that the guides were super cute. how i wish i was ziplining with them all them all the time.
and bikeriding and all those adventurous things. they make being active fun. and sexy.
speaking of, there are a couple of brothers (?) at my hotel hat are so fit. i almost wish i was here with bffs or at least my own bf. constant reminders why getting involved has its benefits. not to mention that it would decrease my illegible scrawls as these musings would more than likely be spoken to said bf.
i've had some weird dreams here too. firstly, a couple nights ago i dreamt that i kissed gb and he didn't seem to have any qualms around it. we were gonna catch up once i was done getting my stuff sorted (i was moving or something) but then i woke up. i also noted he was sweaty and freckly. he was extra gingery in my subconscious then i ever really consider. anyway, that's the second of intimate dreams i've had about geebs. the first having been a week or so ago when the ginge had admitted he'd love me but i couldn't reciprocate. i did appreciate the gesture still, but he didn't seem too thrilled. and perhaps felt a little hurt. i dunnno. subconscious gb is even harder to deciper than real life one.
anyway, my second nocturnal vision came to me last night and was almost too realistic to take for granted. a's friend bryan had told me he'd be interested in dating early on but things had gotten n the way (for example other lovers) but he would really like for us to try. being the commitmentphobe that i am, i couldn't give him a straight answer about going steady but i totally kissed him. twice. before consulting with the girls about the rightness of this coupling. they advised that it has to work because he is a good customer at the diner they work at. other friends sold bry's case to me, saying he was outgoing in unison while he sat there and blushed modestly. i'm sure i woke up at asome point and wasn't sure about the validity of my dream. but i resumed sleep and soon enough there was a group hang type thing and he took some time to talk to me about work and my day and he seemed genuinely interested in shit i had to say .i know i got flustered talking to him which i reckon he found endearing. then i was sure that my dream was true and had ached to ask him why things between him and his ex didnt work. never got around to discussing that as i woke up and faced the tough reality that all of it was just a dream. or dreams rather. have NO IDEA why bryan would be seeping into my subconscious. don't think i have given him a second thought since his bbq in the summertime. my radar doesnt tend to include people who are taken. perhaps this is the universe's way of letting us know he is back on the market.
god sometimes i wish i had my friends here to discuss these jungian issues. i broke today and logged onto facebook with my mom's berry. yesterday i had already checked my hotmail and read my facebook messages anyway. i am weak when it comes to staying disconnected. but 3ish days having cut the cord has been a fairly decent stretch by my standards. anyway, i heard back from liz when i left a message for before i left.. i may do sneaks nye with her. i will have to search around as soon as i get back before i commit. anyway too stressful to think about. so i will take a break.
